A Canine Conundrum
by SwingsUponTheGround
Summary: The turtles found a teenage girl who was apparently a Kraang experiment. She wakes up with no memory and her only possession being a dog. Whose dog? Well, it WAS my dog, but now it's me. You see, HER body used to be MY body, but now I've been brain-switched and all I can do is bark. Great, just great. T because I'm paranoid, I don't intend anything T rated to happen.


**A/N: I know I'm writing another story, but while I was trying to work past my writers block, this idea popped in and I literally burst out laughing at all the possible adventures and misunderstandings that could ensue. Enjoy!**

**P.S. I know it's similar to Plan 10, but in theory it's different. Ugh, that came out weird. I'll explain at the bottom.**

**Disclaimer: I only own the girl and the dog. Plus any other OC's I might decide to add.**

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><p>Summary:<p>

The turtles found a teenage girl who was apparently a Kraang experiment. She wakes up with no memory and her only possession being a dog. Whose dog? Well, it WAS my dog, but now it's me. You see, HER body used to be MY body, but now I've been brain-switched and all I can do is bark. Great, just great.

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><p>Some one was pounding on the inside of my head.<p>

With a groan, I hauled myself into a crawling position. _What happened?_

I shook my head, trying to clear it. Trying to remember what was going on.

We had been visiting my cousins in New York, Mom, Dad, and I. It wasn't a long drive, we lived in Massachusetts, I'd even been aloud to bring Connie, my dog.

Connie. The alley. The men in suits. Oh no.

Everything came rushing back to me. I'd gone on a walk with my cousin and dog. She'd stopped inside a shop with a NO ANIMALS ALOUD sign. So I had waited outside.

I heard noises in the alley. I took Connie to investigate. Next thing I knew, I had been grabbed from behind by a tall man with strong arms. I managed to get a glimpse of his face, emotionless, black hair, brown eyes, before he jabbed a needle in my arm and I passed out. Connie's distressed barks still tore through my eardrums.

I'd been kidnapped.

My eyes snapped open and I jerked my head up. I looked around me. I was in a small cell with metallic walls and a single door with a high, square window.

Groggily, I tried to stand up. I rose about a foot off the ground, and my hands slapped back down. I shook my head. _Ok Samantha, stand up._

My second try exhausted me and sent my vision spinning. I looked around the room again, and something black tickled the edge of my eye. I twisted around, trying to see what it was, but at the last second, it jerked out of view again. In moments I was running in circles, trying desperately to see what was behind me before I stopped, panting.

I stopped, freezing still, and felt the hair on my back standing up. I was in a crawling position, but my legs weren't bent. I could feel it.

I turned another circle, almost instinctively, as the mysterious, black dot reappeared. I stopped again, as I heard the _clack, clack, clack_ every time I set my hands down.

My heart pounded in my throat as I looked down at my hands. My breath choked me, I nearly fainted. I didn't have hands anymore, I had paws. Black, dog paws, to be precise.

I jumped back, away from myself. _No, no, no, no, no, no._ This had to be a nightmare! _I'm a dog? _This was something out of a bad movie! Girl gets kidnapped, turned into dog.

With a sudden idea, I leapt towards the metallic, _reflective_, wall. I saw a mass of black with two blue eyes looking back at me. I recognized myself immediately.

_Connie? I've been turned in Connie?! Ok, calm down. If I'm Connie, then Connie must be me. And if Connie is me, she'll recognize herself and then we can fix this mess. Wait, aren't dogs colorblind? Why can I see blue? This makes no sense. I want to go home! I want to wake up!_

I raised my head, drew a deep breath, and screamed on the top of my, well, _Connie's_ lungs. It came out as a loud and painful howl.

Moments after uttering this cry of complete distress, the door opened and I ran forward to greet my savior.

It was the man who kidnapped me. I stopped dead in my tracks, terror filling me. A whine escaped my throat and my tail tucked itself between my legs (_I have a tail!?_)

A second man, identical to the first but carrying some sort of gun, followed. The first reached out and roughly grabbed the collar I now noticed around my neck. I tried to break away, but his grip was strong and he dragged me out of the cell.

I twisted my head and bit down on his wrist. His grip shifted for a moment, and instead put the pressure on the tag around my collar which said: _Connie, please return to etc._

I jerked again and the thin metal snapped. I hesitated a moment before turning to run. That moment allowed him to regain his grip on my collar.

I was dragged through an endless series of long, bright halls filled with the same men, and strange, humanoid robots all of whom carried a gun, and had a strange pink brain nestled where their stomachs should have been.

I was taken to a large room, and another needle was stuck into me. The effect took action, and suddenly I lost all feeling and collapsed; I could still see and hear.

I was placed on a table and different sensors were attached. On the few screens I could see, my heart rate, breathing rate, and brain activity were being measured.

Something was placed on my head and a moment later I could hear a voice.

_One who is now an animal which is known as dog and which is identified as black, is Kraang being heard by you?_ It said.

I was nervous. _Should I answer?_

_It would be more advisable to pursue a course of action which involves replying to the question which is asked by Kraang, and less advisable to pursue a course of action which does not involve replying to the question which is asked by Kraang._

_It can read my thoughts?_

_Affirmative._

_Uh, yes, I can hear you._

_Are you perceiving with the organs called eyes that which is known as color?_

_Um, yes._

_Are you remembering the identity and lifespan which belonged to you before you became that which you are now?_

_Yes._

_Are you remembering that by which you were once called?_

_Yes, _I, uh, thought more firmly. _Yes. My name is Samantha Tile._

The device was removed, the connection lost.

"Kraang," said a voice as expressionless as the one I had heard in my head. "The experiment which might have been used to advance the Kraang's conquest of the dimension known as 'planet Earth' has not proceeded in the manner which would have been preferable to Kraang. The test subject, known as test subject 18, has indeed been changed from that which is known as human to that which is known as dog, but the test subject retains still the brain and memory of a human. In what course of action should Kraang begin to proceed?"

_What. The. Heck._

"Kraang should prepare for the undoing of that which has been done to the test subjects 18 and 19," the other robot answered. "And the possible erasing of that which is test subject 18's memory."

Relief washed over me. _Thank goodness. _They were going to turn me human again._ Ok, so they might make me forget what happened plus some extra, but that I can live with._

I was picked up and taken out of the room. As I was taken through the halls, feeling and muscle movement began to return to me, but I didn't try to escape. If I escaped, I would be stuck as a dog.

I was taken to a larger cell and a translucent force field separated me from the hall. This time, there was something else in a corner, and I could guess what it was.

I trotted over to my body and gave the closest to a grin that a dog could give. _So that's what I look like with my eyes closed._

Suddenly, my body groaned and the eyes opened. I gave a joyful bark, relived that my body was unharmed and licked my, sorry, _her_ face.

I stopped when I remembered that soon it would be my body again.

I looked at her and she looked at me. I gave an apologetic grin. Would Connie recognize herself?

"Hey, dog," she said. _Gosh, Is that what I sounded like?_

She reached out a hand and rubbed my shoulder. Dread filled me. Connie didn't seem to recognize who she was. Now I wondered whether this girl even had Connie's brain.

She was touching the uncomfortable collar. "No tag. What's your name, girl?" She stopped suddenly.

"Oh," she said, stumbling to her feet and reeling around the room.

"What's MY name!" she screamed, panicking. "I don't know my name. I don't know my name." She was hyperventilating now.

She collapsed on the floor. "I don't know my name. Who am I? Where am I! I don't remember anything! Help!"

She was crying and screaming and I felt sick to my stomach. It wasn't Connie. How could I force an innocent human into a dog's body the same way the Kraang switched me in the first place? Well, we wouldn't have a choice. Connie was gone and I would have a dog with a human mind. The first thing I would do was take this collar off her. It _itches_.

She crawled back over to me, her face was tearstained and her brown eyes were red. She sat next to me and wrapped her arms around me, crying into my fur.

"What happened to me?" she whispered. Pity overcame me and I nuzzled her and licked her face.

The force field came down and two Kraang stepped into the room, both carrying weapons. _This was it._ I felt sickened and guilty. Shame for what was going to happen crushed me.

"Who-who are you?" the girl stuttered, afraid.

"Ones who are known as test subjects 18 and 19," the Kraang began. "That which would have been known as the reversing of that which is known as experiment 3 will no longer be occurring to you. Prepare yourselves for the termination of that which is known as you lives."

I was stunned. The Kraang raised the guns, the new me screamed, blood pounded in my ears. I don't know why I did what I did next, I just did it.

I ran forward and jumped up, knocking off the aim of the nearest Kraang robot and sinking my sharp teeth into its mechanical arm. I bit down hard enough.

Sparks flew and the arm twitched and spasmed, showing that connection had been cut off for the moment. I let go and leapt at the other one, kicking out with my front paws as hard as I could in the place where I knew the brain to be. I felt its squishy face before the robot fell back and began twitching like its fellow had.

I turned around and, jumping, sank my teeth into the neck of the other Kraang which was preparing to shoot my former body. I latched down with my powerful jaws and wouldn't let go until it collapsed and stopped moving.

Panting heavily, I looked up. The girl was staring at me, wonder in her eyes.

"Dog-" she began.

A loud squealing interrupted and the brains popped out of the robots, startling me and setting the girl screaming again.

They scuttled out of the room on long, squid-like tentacles. Before I could react, another Kraang droid appeared and the force field returned.

I ran at the field, trying to break through, but it was unyielding. The girl started pounding on it and screaming for help as I started barking my head off.

I ran back and forth between the immobile robots and the force field, howling in terror. _We were trapped, we were going to die._

The girl's screams ended with a gasp and I turned back to her. I followed her gaze and my howling stopped as well.

There was a large, _green_ creature crouched by the force field trying to pick the lock. I froze, shocked and trying to collect my senses. C_ould my day get any weirder? _Yes, in fact.

Purple beams were flying past the cell as three other green things were dodging them and occasionally ducking out of sight from the cell to destroy a Kraang. I squinted at them, at the shells on their backs. _Were those things . . . turtles?_

"Don't worry," the one picking the lock said. "I'll have you out in a jiffy."

"Donnie, hurry up!" another one shouted, narrowly dodging a beam.

"Just a second!" the first one called back and he leaned forward, finally grasping two wires.

"Dog! Come here! Quickly!" the girl said, bending down slightly and reaching out.

I highly resented being called "dog," but now was neither the time nor the place to complain. I didn't have the means, either.

I trotted over to her and she grasped my collar. I shook her head, trying to dislodge her grip. It was very uncomfortable.

"Got it!" the turtle shouted. The force field disappeared and the girl hurried forward, beckoned by the four turtles and dragging me along.

_What happened to no talking to strangers?_ I wanted to shout. I had to settle for a bark before we were sprinting down a hall headed who know where.

We reached and elevator and all six of us slammed inside, one of the turtles hurriedly jabbing the down button.

"Who are you?" the girl asked breathlessly. "Where is this place? What going - "

"Look," said the turtle with the blue mask. "We don't have a lot of time to explain now, so you'll just have to trust us."

_No_, I barked.

_Yes_, the girl nodded.

"Why are we bringing that dog," the turtle with the red mask demanded. "It'll just slow us down. We should leave it behind."

"No!" the girl, crouching next to me. For once we agreed. "Please, you have to take her. She-she's all I have left." Tears sprang up in her eyes and her chin trembled. Oh good grief.

"What do you mean?" Blue asked. "Where's your family?"

"I don't have a family," she buried her face in my fur and I could tell she was crying. "I-I woke up in the c-cell and I c-can't remember anything. But she, the d-dog, she protected me. I think I m-might have been her owner once."

Her whole body was shaking and you could hear her crying. I felt conflicted. No, she had never been my owner but, she'd never had her own body, really. I _was_ all she had right now. And I guess she was all that was left for me, too.

"Aww. It's ok. Don't cry," said one with an orange mask crouching next to her. "Don't worry, Leo won't let Raph get rid of your dog. My name's Michelangelo, but you can call me Mikey. It's nice to meet you."

She smiled a little and shook his offered hand.

"So, you probably don't have a name, right?" he asked brightly. "I'm good with names."

"Not a good time right now," said the one with the purple mask. "We're almost there."

Everyone scrambled to their feet, the turtles took fighting positions, I got ready to run for my life. I was still pretty sure Red that would abandon me without hesitation.

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><p><strong>AN: So? What do you think? I was laughing mostly at the awkwardness that would occur if was ever turned human again.**

**What I meant about Plan 10 was that in Plan 10, they wanted a plain and simple brain switch. In this theory, it was supposed to be both brains were completely erased and warped to seem exactly the same as the animal which it would then appear to be. what I mean is, a "dog brain turned human" would see color, a "human brain turned dog" wouldn't. But in this version was the mistake of the experiment only working perfectly for "dog to human."**

**Also, in case you couldn't tell, I was subtly mocking the many OC females who get rescued by the turtles. I'm sorry, yes I am a girl, but in my opinion way too many authors overplay the whole "damsel in distress" thing.**

**Anyway, Review please! (By review I mean either encourage, praise, or burn in utter fiery hate and rage. I accept all.) Also please point out any grammatical mistakes or awkwardness in sentence structure if you feel the need. (I love nit-pickers!)**

**YAY! NEW EPISODE TONIGHT!**


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